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WANTED: Liposuction. My doctor says I'm too fat.

WANTED: A small Cesna prop plane so I don't have to drive so far to work!

Name:
The Best of Freecycle
Location:
Website:
Membership:
Open
Posting Access:
All Members
The History Lesson:

You may be familiar with Freecycle, an online mailing list similar to Craigslist or an online version of Goodwill. The concept is really quite cool. Basically you sign up on a mailing list and if/when you have some crap you no longer want but don't really think is valuable, for example, leftover bricks from a building project or an old squeaky bed or whatever, you send out an email to the list in the hopes that your trash is another's treasure.

Again, the concept is really cool. But few things ever work as well in real practice, right? Particularly not when there are the multitudes of greedy bastards out there that are always looking for a handout.

You could post that you're giving away used tampons and someone out there would ask for them, no joke. Hell, not only that, three people would ask for them within mere seconds of your post, and the ones who didn't get the prize would bicker about how unfair it was that they didn't get anything.

Or perhaps you post that you have five or six different things to get rid of. Invariably you will have *some* fruit respond with an emphatic and all-caps "I WANT IT ALL DO YOU DELIVER I HAVE FOUR KIDS AND NO CAR AND I LIVE IN RIDGETOP!!!"

Unfortunately, some people just weren't taught manners, selflessness, and respect for others. And what better pasttime than to make fun of them, right? So here's where this community comes in.

One feature of some Freecycle communities is the addition of "WANTED" posts. The WANTED idea is that someone might want something small that others wouldn't consider valuable, for example, dirt from an excavation or coffee grounds for gardeners. Oh, but no, obviously the WANTED idea has turned into a veritable charity corner for "hard-working people trying to make ends meet" to ask for things every family should have. Things like billiards tables, above-ground swimming pools, and crown moulding to "spice up a decorating project."

If only this were a joke. By the way, if you're into this idea, I NEED a black Jaguar XK8 and someone to sponsor DVR for me on Comcast every month.

So this community is dedicated to the guy who posted "MY POLICE SCANNER BROKE!! I NEED A NEW ONE!!! PLEASE GIVE ME ONE!!!" I kid you not. It's like dude has never heard of Radio Shack and legal tender.

So if you're interested, find your local installment of Freecycle, sign up, and post your ridiculous "WANTED" posts or other ridiculous Freecycle responses/happenings.

Rules

1. Keep everything anonymous. I don't want to get yelled at because Clarence in Palm Springs got fifteen emails from people making fun of his request for a Koi pond. Omit names and email addresses. At this time I don't care if you tell which branch of Freecycle you're posting from...I don't see this being a major problem, just don't post names.

2. Usual play nice rules. If you're a Freecycler and you made some ridiculous request for a jet ski that someone on here has posted to make fun of you, feel free to politely defend yourself, but lay off the name-calling or other crap. You asked for it, so, hey, take the heat, learn some manners, and try getting a job instead of expecting other people to bankroll your hobbies, kids, etc.

Members? You're adults. If you want to start drama and snits among yourselves, you're going to have to defend yourselves, too. As long as it doesn't violate the LJ TOS, I'm not going to make you all be friends.

3. Use LJ-Cut for your entries. Slightly describe what you're posting in the title (for example, "Golf Clubs, Leather Bondage Gear in Albuquerque").

If you don't know how to do this, it's done as follows, but with <> signs in place of the braces: {lj-cut text="TITLE HERE"} TYPE YOUR ENTRY {/lj-cut}

And, well, that's pretty much it!

<3,

Your beloved moderator, clockworktomato

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